Chucking out another batch of old magazines and as I flicked through the pages making sure I hadn’t any important paperwork stuffed into them, this gem caught my eye, a truly priceless series of quotes from the era of the Nu-Metal led boon in all things ‘Alt-Music’ based of the early 2000s.
Here are some real gems from ‘Mark’ from Wolverhampton, but the punch line is the final quote that had me saying ‘Aww bless him’ out loud on reading it. I think we’re all as guilty of that sort of cringe inducing lack of self awareness and obvious naivety when young.
I know for a fact that I was at times Mark describes himself as being an ‘Old Skool Rocker’ mainly because he’s been hanging around Wolverhampton skate park since he was 14 and is now (at the time of him writing his missive) the grand old age of 20.

Q- what do you do?
A- Drink Jack Daniels and Whiskey, gigs and chilling out.

Q- Favourite bands?
A- Black Sabbath, Machine Head, Pantera, Pissing Razors and Slayer.

Q- How would you describe yourself?
A- Freak!

Q- What do you normally wear?
A- Band T-Shirts, army boots with combats covered in band patches. Either wear my trenchcoat or slayer hoodie.

Q- What makes you cool?
A- Being an Individual.

The ending comment from the editor is rather funny as well.”We always like to hear from our readers when they have something interesting to say – or in the case of Mark, even when they have nothing to say. Have any more of our readers meaningless profiles of themselves to send in?”

The image I have (and rather unfairly I might add) built up of ‘Mark’ is of him idly leafing through the pages of his newly arrived Attitude Clothing Mail Order catalogue as he sits on a half wall near to the skaters, emos and assorted other ‘Alt-Music’ teeny tribes of the early and mid 2000’s, sweltering in his long leather duster coat but unable to remove it with the fear of being accused of being a poseur if he did so. Tut-tutting as the parade of similarly dressed groups walk by and judging them all to be trendies or band wagon jumpers.

I’ve always been amazed at the lengths some people go to in order to adopt such a dedicated image, a uniform look, of a subgenre. Rarely do the bands follow these fads and fashions and the fans seem to be following unwritten rules to some unspoken sumptuary laws handed down over the years.

… So says the man who sported a bright red Mohican, studded leather jacket and battered combat boots over the years.